[ Dave's life makes little sense on a day to day basis (case in point: this entire situation) and his semi-dramatic ramblings don't really help to put things in perspective usually. He's probably the only person who would find the idea of not giving someone a lifetime supply of apple juice, given the chance, to be cruel and unusual. ]
Nah. I found some - last time I saw any, since this was the day the world ended, you know? - in my closet, which was pretty normal since that's where I kept anything I wanted to eat or drink, but John. [ Let's just ignore how that's a weird place to keep food and concentrate on the main issue here: ] John. I told him about it before I went to drink it, and he had to bring up Howie Mandel and Little Monsters? And I was going to ignore it but then I just kept thinking about it. Though obviously you should never tell him this because I'm pretty sure he doesn't know he won that one, come to think of it. His prankster's gambit needs no help.
[ Literally nothing cool happens in his life, ever. This is the tip of a very large ice berg. More importantly: Dirk apparently had actually cool things happening to him. He built rap robots? One of whom was basically a travelling rap ninja.
How is this even real life. ]
You built a world-travelling rap robot. [ He just. Has to peer over the top of his shades at Dirk, because holy shit. ] Oh my god, you're an anime character. The truth of my lineage has been unearthed. I better start running around with toast in my mouth and checking things off the animu bucket list. Do you think I get a freebie on my eyes? But seriously, world-travelling rap robot. Unironically radical.
no subject
Nah. I found some - last time I saw any, since this was the day the world ended, you know? - in my closet, which was pretty normal since that's where I kept anything I wanted to eat or drink, but John. [ Let's just ignore how that's a weird place to keep food and concentrate on the main issue here: ] John. I told him about it before I went to drink it, and he had to bring up Howie Mandel and Little Monsters? And I was going to ignore it but then I just kept thinking about it. Though obviously you should never tell him this because I'm pretty sure he doesn't know he won that one, come to think of it. His prankster's gambit needs no help.
[ Literally nothing cool happens in his life, ever. This is the tip of a very large ice berg. More importantly: Dirk apparently had actually cool things happening to him. He built rap robots? One of whom was basically a travelling rap ninja.
How is this even real life. ]
You built a world-travelling rap robot. [ He just. Has to peer over the top of his shades at Dirk, because holy shit. ] Oh my god, you're an anime character. The truth of my lineage has been unearthed. I better start running around with toast in my mouth and checking things off the animu bucket list. Do you think I get a freebie on my eyes? But seriously, world-travelling rap robot. Unironically radical.